And Lent begins...

Today's the day we begin again that forty day trek to Easter.  While the weather might make us think otherwise, spring really is coming.  Last year I decided that for Lent I would write a devotion/reflection each day until Easter.  If you look at my blog, you'll realize that since Easter last year I have not written very much, so here we are again - as I devote myself to writing each day until Easter.  If you are reading this I'd love to hear from you and welcome your thoughts.  

I have struggled this year with the idea of giving something up for Lent.  I will be honest in telling you that giving up something seems really dangerous in light of the upcoming Wesley mission trip that will have at least 30 people on it.  I'm not sure it's a good time for me, (or for those I will be around) to stop eating chocolate or drinking coffee.  I have been going to the gym pretty regularly so that isn't really a matter of self-discipline.  There is always room for improvement in my practice of spiritual disciplines like prayer and reading Scripture.  But there's one area in my life that really plagues me, one area that is dangerously destructive, not to mention spiritually defeating.  So for Lent this year I am going to do everything I can to say only positive things to myself.  If you've been around me for any length of time you know that I can make fun of myself pretty easily and I don't mind laughing about the dumb things I do/say.  Somehow these bits of laughter can lead directly to my believing that I'm not doing enough, smart enough, pretty enough, or just plain enough.  This struggle has gotten worse as I have gotten older and for it to be reversed I am going to be intentional about stopping these negative thoughts in their tracks - to be replaced with loving and encouraging thoughts.  

I am seriously a very blessed person - and I am so often encouraged by others that I should not have any trouble believing that I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  It's easy for me to share that belief with you and all other people.  When I look at the people God has placed in my life, whether the students I see every week or the many beloved folks I have grown to love while serving churches, college-friends, hometown folks - all of you - I am often overwhelmed at God's work in and through you and the power and connection of the Holy Spirit.  Somehow I have failed to truly receive God's grace, mercy and love fully for myself.  So that's my goal.  I might need your help to stay on track, but I know that the end result will be filled with joyful recognition and embrace.  

One of today's most well loved Scriptures is Psalm 51.  Read it below from The Message: 

1-3 Generous in love—God, give grace!

    Huge in mercy—wipe out my bad record.

Scrub away my guilt,

    soak out my sins in your laundry.

I know how bad I’ve been;

    my sins are staring me down.

4-6 

You’re the One I’ve violated, and you’ve seen

    it all, seen the full extent of my evil.

You have all the facts before you;

    whatever you decide about me is fair.

I’ve been out of step with you for a long time,

    in the wrong since before I was born.

What you’re after is truth from the inside out.

    Enter me, then; conceive a new, true life.

7-15 

Soak me in your laundry and I’ll come out clean,

    scrub me and I’ll have a snow-white life.

Tune me in to foot-tapping songs,

    set these once-broken bones to dancing.

Don’t look too close for blemishes,

    give me a clean bill of health.

God, make a fresh start in me,

    shape a Genesis week from the chaos of my life.

Don’t throw me out with the trash,

    or fail to breathe holiness in me.

Bring me back from gray exile,

    put a fresh wind in my sails!

Give me a job teaching rebels your ways

    so the lost can find their way home.

Commute my death sentence, God, my salvation God,

    and I’ll sing anthems to your life-giving ways.

Unbutton my lips, dear God;

    I’ll let loose with your praise.

16-17 

Going through the motions doesn’t please you,

    a flawless performance is nothing to you.

I learned God-worship

    when my pride was shattered.

Heart-shattered lives ready for love

    don’t for a moment escape God’s notice.

18-19 

Make Zion the place you delight in,

    repair Jerusalem’s broken-down walls.

Then you’ll get real worship from us,

    acts of worship small and large,

Including all the bulls

    they can heave onto your altar!

So today I am throwing myself in the "laundry of the Lord" praying that each day the stains in my life will be scrubbed clean by the One who sees me through the eyes of love and grace.  Let's pray for one another on this Lenten journey - what are your plans or thoughts this day?

Prayer:  God, you know my shortcomings and you know my strengths.  Help me to focus less on the weaknesses in my life, help me to perceive myself as you see me.  May I have your eyes when I interact with others and trust in the presence of Your Spirit working in the midst of relationships.  Strengthen me this day in faith, hope, and of course, in love.  Amen.