If only you knew...

I started to write a very deep and thought-provoking post on Sunday (please take note of the sarcasm in this sentence).  I'd listened to three different sermons and felt like I had something profound to say about faith and injustice and the way it seems to be playing out in the lives of my students at FSU.  It totally sucked so I erased it.  Here's what I really want to say....

I'm not so special.  

I feel like I must be the most encouraged person on the planet.  This past week my students made this amazing video for me for Christmas.  They spoke of how glad they are that I'm working with them.  It actually left me speechless (which is quite the miracle).  I am encouraged so often with kind words, hugs, people who aren't afraid to share their lives with me.  I've served three different churches, and while not all have been a piece of cake, all have encouraged me to continue this dance of ministry.  I have had wonderful friends in my life (many of whom I miss terribly...especially all of you in OH and GA).  People let me into their families, into the moments of excitement and sorrow.  It's overwhelming to me and I want to let it all sink into my heart - but I live with myself every single moment.


Here's what I know.....
I am the woman with the sweet tooth that never ends, the same woman who wants to lose weight.  The one who longs to be organized, keep her house clean, cook without fear.  I live with myself: this gal who thinks she can accomplish too much in a short amount of time which means I'm always rushing.  I am the daughter who doesn't really know how to be the daughter her parent's need her to be.  I'm the aunt who doesn't see my BEAUTIFUL niece as often as I should.  I'm the mom of a dog who definitely didn't get an A in obedience class.  He eats people food, sleeps in my bed, and knows that even when he's bad he's going to be spoiled.

I'm the pastor who forgets to pray, who served Communion with Christmas cookies and grape kool-aid.  The pastor who sometimes works so hard for God that she forgets to include God in the work.  The one who wants every single human being to know that they are loved by God - yet can't seem to really get that through her own thick skull.

So I hear these encouraging words, share in these amazing relationships, and get overwhelmed by God's work in the midst of the messiest situations.  And so often I can only reply like Elizabeth did when Mary arrived...."Who am I?"

I'm the shmuck that God is redeeming.  I'm the inadequate, dorky, competitive, soul that God is transforming.  Most of all I am blessed beyond what I deserve.  I am grateful beyond description. I am on this journey with all of you, praying that the Kingdom of God will be revealed for all the children of the world (red, yellow, black and white).  I'm still naive enough to believe that we can make a difference.  That one smile, kindness, or honest conversation can start a trend that will change the world in big ways.

You and I are the same - though  different.  We have been implanted with this thing called grace.  It challenges us, embraces us, and opens us to God's amazing presence in our lives and in the world.  We're the same you and me - yearning to know that we matter, struggling to realize that nothing we can do will cause God to love us more or less.

So thank you for your friendship and encouragement.  If you're reading this I imagine our paths have crossed along the way.  I only pray that I can encourage and love all of you the way you have me.  In the midst of so much pain, sorrow and injustice in the world lets do our best to be real - to recognize that we all have a long way to go - and yet we are in this business of being the Light of Christ in the here and now.

You are important my friends.  To me for sure, but most importantly to the One who calls us right where we are to be redeemed, transformed, and real.

More Heart....Less Attack

I'm pretty geeked that tonight is the last night I will have to listen to political ads, how about you?  I'm always amazed at how pointed these ads are - so often failing to speak of what a candidate represents, but quick to point out why their competition is terrible.  We live in a world where fear keeps us on the defensive.  Whether it's politics or religion we are constantly bombarded with information (and mis-information) that keeps us at odds with one another.  The hardest part is that as we do our best to discern our own beliefs we often realize that we are at odds with the people we love.  

It is so easy to attack the "other" no matter what that other might be.  Every single day I am confronted by "gray-area" questions and ideas, while at the same time I am sent email forwards and Facebook pictures claiming that "this" is what God has to say about the matter.  My question becomes, why do we have to be so certain?  

After a great conversation with my DS today I realized that we are all just trying our best to figure God out.  We want the details,  We want to know where "God" stands on this or that issue.  It is just not that easy!  If God wanted us to have God-size knowledge we would.  God continues to reveal God's self every single day - and yet there is still more to discover, uncover, and grasp!  It is when we think we have it all figured out that we really have the most to learn.  Especially when what we think we know leads to unfair judgement of another.

Often when I'm confronted with people who just plain disagree with me (whether it be my theology or just my personality) it makes me want to react.  Perhaps it is the competitive spirit that resides in my soul.  It's easy for me to wish people would just get it, because I'm so certain that I have been enlightened on this or that.  It's easier to react then to love.  

So on this eve of election day I challenge you to vote (of course).  More than that I challenge you to be someone who loves first.  More Heart and Less Attack is a song from NeedtoBreathe, a group that I'm loving right now.  I've been listening to this today and it really speaks to me.  Maybe it will speak to you too?  The lyrics and the link to listen are below.

In the meantime I think this idea is something from which we can all learn - more heart and less attack.  It's a message for the church, it's a message for you and me.  I think it's Christ's message.  


Here are the lyrics, and the link to the video is below:

Be the light in the cracks

Be the one that's mending the camel’s back

Slow to anger and quick to laugh

Be more heart and less attack

Be the wheels not the track

Be the wanderer that's coming back

Leave the past right where it's at

Be more heart and less attack

The more you take, the less you have

‘Cause it’s you in the mirror that's starin’ back

Quick to let go, slow to react

Be more heart and less attack

Ever growing, steadfast

And if need be, the one that's in the gap

Be the never turning back

Twice the heart any man could have

Be the wheels not the track

Be the wanderer that's coming back

Leave the past right where it's at

Be more heart and less attack

Be more heart and less attack

I stuck my hat out

I caught the rain drops

I drank the water

I felt my veins pop

I’m nearly sanctified

I’m nearly broken

I’m down the river, I’m nearly open

I’m down the river, to where I’m going

Listen here:  http://youtu.be/J6tVWqxOqbo

4 Months In...

Four months on the job at the Wesley House at Ferris.  Four whole months!  In some ways it has flown, in others it feels like it has been a long series of new adventures, roles, and lots of unanswered questions (like how DO you fix the mysterious leak above my desk?)  Students need a United Methodist presence on their campuses.  While we have Wesley Foundations present on five campuses (FSU, CMU, MSU, GVSU, WMU) there are many other campuses in West Michigan that need to know the open hearts, minds and doors of the UMC.  Overall though, I have come to many new realizations.  Here's a few:

• The thing that makes Wesley Campus Ministries different than lots of other campus churches is the importance we place on leadership development.  Now, I am NOT saying that all of our students will become pastors.  I am saying that a high percentage of our students will bring an active and passionate love of Christ into the world and into the church.  Our entire goal is to empower them to be ministers right in the midst of their campus.  
• United Methodist theology is the message the world needs - but let's just start small with those young adults facing that looming question of "What am I going to do with my life?"  the cool part is that our students are wrestling with faith in the midst of discovering their God-purpose on the planet.  It's not just about making $$ or even which field might offer them the most job prospects.  Many of our students are discovering their gifts in the midst of discussions about grace, works, and discipleship.  I think we can all agree that this is a very good thing for the world.
• Without the connection and ministry shares we wouldn't exist.  We are sort of like a new church start every for years with a missionary sort of feel.  While we directors are paid I realize now that every single one of us would probably take less of a salary if it were permitted.  For us it is about mission:  making disciples of Jesus Christ for the transformation of the world.  If you get to know us you will realize that all of us are SO hopeful and joy-filled because we get to see the church of NOW....and the church of what's next.  
• Because of this realization I truly believe that Wesley Campus Ministries can be the motivating force in our conference.  We can bring light and hope to an often challenging system.  We can prove that our the UMC is still very relevant - that God's not done with us yet!  Campus ministry is a movement, it is overwhelming, it is fun.  It is steeped in prayer and relationship.  Most of all it takes a boat-load of trust that God will provide what we need to reach those students that long to know the love of God.  

I've also realized a few things about myself  - 

• I have no patience.  This is a tough one.  I always thought I was ok with this, but now am realizing how LONG it takes to develop a program, train up leaders, and figure out this thing called campus ministry.  The good news = despite my shortcomings God has blessed us this first semester.  The bad news = once I get this year figured out it will be summer and the whole thing will change again with graduation and new faces in the fall.  
• I miss the church.  I'm a travelling preacher these days, but have run out of gigs at this point.  While it is a blast to fill in for pastors that are away, I really miss having that rhythm of Sunday morning preaching and celebrating.  I am attending church for the first time in a long time and it is a good thing.  I think I have some soul work to do and this is the time to do it!
• This ministry takes a lot of heart.  Campus ministry is NOT youth ministry.  It isn't about planning lessons or events.  Sure that's a part of it - but the real heart of campus ministry is about being real.  These students know we are trained, they know we are pastors - but most of all they know we are real people who are on this journey of faith with them.  It's about coming alongside the students at their best times and worst - about encouraging and holding accountable.  Nothing makes you more vulnerable than being truly open with a young person, reassuring them that they're not alone and that we have been there before too.  

As we enter into lots of larger discussion surrounding our purpose and whether or not these Wesley's are an effective use of funds I want you all to know that the answer is yes.  I invite you to come and meet us - pick the campus closest to you - encounter worship and study that is directly impacting the UMC.  Come and worship in a space that requires nothing from you and allows you to be wherever you are - wear whatever you want - and say whatever God puts on our hearts.  

I'm going to try to keep this blog up - as a way to process and hold myself accountable to this journey.  Feel free to read and comment if you like I'd love to hear your thoughts.  

Blessings my friends.

Holy Saturday Devotional: A Vigil to Keep

As Pharaoh drew near, the Israelites looked back, and there were the Egyptians advancing on them. In great fear the Israelites cried out to the LORD.

 They said to Moses, "Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you have taken us away to die in the wilderness? What have you done to us, bringing us out of Egypt?

Is this not the very thing we told you in Egypt, 'Let us alone and let us serve the Egyptians'? For it would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than to die in the wilderness."

But Moses said to the people, "Do not be afraid, stand firm, and see the deliverance that the LORD will accomplish for you today; for the Egyptians whom you see today you shall never see again.

The LORD will fight for you, and you have only to keep still."

Exodus 14:10-14

This is the Scripture from Exodus that follows the Passover story, and leads directly into God's gifting Moses the ability to part the Red Sea, ensuring the Israelites safety from the encroaching Egyptian army.  Remember that God "passed-over" the homes of the Israelites who had prepared lamb just as directed, wiping blood on the frames of their doors while the unmarked doors were subject to the death of their young sons. God was faithful to His people, who had been enslaved and oppressed, offering them a chance at freedom. 

In the above Scripture they have followed Moses into the wilderness, yet while looking back they recognize the Egyptian army (who was really mad now) coming after them.  They don't stand a chance, or so it would seem.  In fact they'd rather go back and live as slaves then to wander in the unknown of the wilderness.

Holy Saturday is what we call today, many faith traditions keep prayer vigil until the early hours of Easter.  It is a day during which we pause and reflect, wondering at the tomb as did the followers of Jesus.  They grieved.  They wondered if what they had come to believe as Truth was really just a fallacy.  Their foundations were rocked.  They were in the wilderness.

We too know what the wilderness is like.  Often we find ourselves there, wishing, hoping and praying for answers, for comfort, for good news.  Often like the Israelites we would rather cling to the known, bad habits, destructive talk, that which draws us away from God.  It is easier to go back, than to trust God to lead us forward into the unknown.  

Tonight let us reflect on the last verse stated above:

                      The LORD will fight for you, and you have only to keep still."

What does it mean for you to know that even in the darkness of death the Lord will fight for you?  Are there areas in your life right now for which God's call may be to "only keep still"?  

As we draw near to our Easter celebrations, let us do our best to stay in the mystery of this day - waiting, watching, wondering.

Prayer:  O God, in the darkness of the death of Christ you still speak to us.  Help us to receive your word this night, show us how to draw close to you, to trust you even in the wilderness.  Help us to give ourselves over to the your promise of faithfulness, though it is often so much easier to do things our way.  And God, as we rest this night and wake in the morning, may our lips be filled with praise.  Amen.  

Lent Devotional: Good Friday

O Come and Mourn with Me a While

"O come and mourn with me awhile

O come near to the Savior's side

O come together, let us mourn

Jesus our Lord is crucified

Seven times He spoke

Seven words of love

And all three hours His silence cried

For mercy on the souls of men

Jesus our Lord is crucified

O love of God, O sin of man

In this dread act your strength is tried

And victory remains with love

Jesus our Lord is crucified

O break, O break hard heart of mine

My weak self-love and guilty pride

His Pilate and His Judas were

Jesus our Lord is Crucified

O love of God, O sin of man

In this dread act your strength is tried

And victory remains with Love

Jesus our Lord is crucified

O come and mourn with awhile

A broken heart, a fount of tears

Ask and they will not be denied

A broken heart love's cradle is

Jesus our Lord is crucified

Jesus our Lord is crucified

Jesus our Lord is crucified

Our Lord is crucified

And victory remains with love

Jesus our Lord is crucified

O love of God, O sin of man

In this dread act your strength is tried

And victory remains with love

Jesus our Lord is crucified"

-Jars of Clay, click here to hear the song: 

O Come and Mourn with Me a While

Today marks the fulfillment of God's mission in Christ on Earth.  Though not as it may seem to the Roman authorities and the Pharisees, victory has been declared.  

Are you able to stand beside the cross this day?  Can you stay in the fear and grief of a life without the Christ who has claimed victory for you?  Can you put yourself in the shoes of Peter whose denial will forever be a part of history?  Maybe you can relate to Mary, the pain and suffering that only a parent who has lost a child can know.  

Grief is something we have all experienced, and the challenge for today is to stay there; to allow the violence a bit of a space in our hearts.  It isn't something we like to think about, and yet it is the way we have overcome.  Today is Good, not just good.  Good in the eternal sense of the Almighty God having chosen each of us.  Not only do we have a Savior, but we have a Savior who knows what it is like to have the human struggles of grief, pain, loss...and the excitement of joy, blessing, and love.  

I hope that you have been able to experience worship today, somewhere - someplace.  (If not, get in the car...we worship at 7).  If you haven't, at least take a few minutes to reflect on the meaning of today for you.  What does the cross mean to you?

Prayer:  God today we find ourselves caught in the juxtaposition of grief and joy.  Help us to understand fully the gift of the cross and just what it means for us.  In the midst Lord, show us how to love others as you have called us to do, recognizing that this gift is a universal one.  Amen.  

Lent Devotion: Beautiful Feet

Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist.  After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him.

He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, “Lord, are you going to wash my feet?”

Jesus replied, “You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.”

“No,” said Peter, “you shall never wash my feet.”

Jesus answered, “Unless I wash you, you have no part with me.”

“Then, Lord,” Simon Peter replied, “not just my feet but my hands and my head as well!”

This Scripture is from the Gospel of John, chapter 13.  If you have attended a Maundy Thursday service, you probably heard it.  Today we celebrate many things, from Passover (Exodus 12) to Jesus new mandate (Maundy) to love one another.  We remember the sacrifice of Jesus as we commemorate the Last Supper with the disciples in the Upper Room.  

I realized today that I become the ultimate worship nerd at times like this.  I want to go all out, to do whatever it takes for people to experience the love and faithfulness of God as we approach the cross.  It isn't just about decorating tables or sanctuaries, it is about experiencing the reality of what was, and the joy of what has been offered to us through Jesus' life, death and resurrection.  

Sometimes I feel a lot like Peter.  Peter always wants to go the extra mile with Jesus.  He wants to be the "best" disciple he can be.  He wants Jesus to know he is loyal and passionate about his friendship.  Tonight as I read the above Scripture aloud I thought about Peter's willingness to do whatever it took to be close to Christ.  He is ready for a bath, while Jesus is simply trying to serve the ones he loves.  Again the tables are turned as Jesus humbles himself to wash the feet of those who have done the following.  Peter isn't sure he should receive this gift at first, and then he gets a little over-zealous in trying to connect with Jesus.

I think one of the more difficult aspects of faith this time of year is the challenge that comes in being open to receiving.  Most of us are really great at giving.  It feels great to give something to someone else.  It can be really difficult to receive, to say thank you and just be grateful.  Think about it.  I'm sure you have been given a compliment, only to turn around and say, "No...."  Perhaps you have been given a gift and rather than just receive and be grateful you feel guilty that you have nothing to reciprocate.  Faith is a gift - and no matter how hard we work for God we will never be able to do enough to "earn" the free gift of grace.  Faith requires an openness to receiving.  

Peter learned many lessons from Jesus.  I imagine that along with his growth in faith and maturity, he became a person who could receive the gift of a friendship with Jesus (no strings attached.)  

So tonight, a simple reminder that I have been told many times before, "Nothing you can do will make God love you more.  Nothing you do will make God love you less."  It is about our ability to receive with open hearts - and then to share the gift with others.

Prayer:  Giver of life, love, and peace tonight I come to you with gratitude.  I thank you for the people you have placed in my life that have shown me how to receive with grace.  Help me this Holy Thursday to truly receive the gifts of salvation, love, and faith as I prepare to journey to the cross with Christ tomorrow.  Mold me, shape me, fill me by your Spirit.  Amen.  

Lent Devotion: Stuff

Today I have spoken with so many wonderful people that are dealing with "stuff."  It is human nature I suppose to always have "stuff" to deal with - both the expected and unexpected.  Some people can deal with "stuff" courageously, looking for God-opportunities that lie therein.  Others are overwhelmed by "stuff" and in the process of trying desperately to have control they actually lose themselves.  Stuff can get in our way, but stuff can also teach us.  

What stuff are you dealing with right this very moment?  Anything seem big enough to swallow you up?  Anything you've been overly-focused on at the expense of another?  If you had to make a list of the "stuff" in your life, how many items would it contain?  Would it fit on a note card?  A notebook?

Think for a minute about the stuff the people in Scripture had to interpret.  In the Old Testament there are many examples of "stuff" getting in the way of God's best intentions for God's people.  Think about Moses.  Remember when he was standing in the very presence of God and he said..."but God, I can't even speak well?"  Like, "God, seriously, you don't want me do you?"

Think about David for a second.  A young shepherd called to be King.  He found himself in front of Goliath.  Sometimes "stuff" feels pretty gigantic.  He had faith so strong (and aim so good) that the "stuff" was taken to the ground.  

Maybe it's Daniel that came to your mind.  Ever felt like your "stuff" might swallow you whole?  Facing a lion with hope and prayer allowed Daniel to triumph and God to be glorified.

Then there's those NT angels always bringing "stuff" to people - good news is how it's titled, yet it might not have seemed so good if you were young Mary or Joseph.  

I bet the Disciples had a lot of "stuff" too.  Think about the first time you left home.   Think about these young fishermen called to drop their nets.  Their fathers were probably heard saying, "What about our family business?"  They had "stuff" too, yet they followed as obediently and faithfully as they could.  

Read these words from the Book of Hebrews:

12 "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, 2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.3 Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."

Does your "stuff" hinder you?  How can you work through it, or shed the stuff that binds you?  What would it take for you to enter into this Easter weekend free from "stuff" - and free to be the newly created son/daughter of God that lives with abundant joy?

Stuff happens - but God is faithful.  Stuff happens, but we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses that we need not be hindered.  Stuff happens, but we are free to run with perseverance the race of the gift of life.  Stuff happens, but God can turn our stuff into stepping stones.  Take sometime to examine your "stuff."  Set it on a shelf for awhile.  Look at it through the eyes of God.  Maybe, just maybe, all that "stuff" isn't so important.  Maybe all that "stuff" is going to glorify God as you too are glorified.  Stuff happens - do not grow weary and lose heart.


Prayer:  Lord, help me to focus less on the "stuff" in my life and more on the sacred journey of this Holy Week.   Help me to run with perseverance, not to give up or feel overwhelmed, but to grasp on to your faithful promises of life and joy.  Be with those this day who need to know that they do not bear their burdens alone.  Call me into loving relationships with those who need to know the joy of life in you, and help me to set my stuff aside so that I can fully grasp onto the gifts I am going to receive this Holy Week.  Amen.  

Lent Devotional: Chosen

One of the Scripture for today, the Tuesday of Holy Week is found in the Book of Isaiah. I have always had compassion for the prophets of the Old Testament.  God asks them to do some pretty strange things in the name of calling people back to connection with God.  Their voices are powerfully filled with compassion and yearning for their own people to listen and heed God's call.  The people don't listen, they are stuck in their ways, they are not so sure Isaiah (Jeremiah..and the like) really are worth listening to.  Change is hard anyways, right?

This is the voice of Isaiah, claiming his "chosen-ness" by God for the prophetic work to which he is dedicated.  

49 Listen to me, you islands;
    hear this, you distant nations:
Before I was born the Lord called me;
    from my mother’s womb he has spoken my name.
2 He made my mouth like a sharpened sword,
    in the shadow of his hand he hid me;
he made me into a polished arrow
    and concealed me in his quiver.
3 He said to me, “You are my servant,
    Israel, in whom I will display my splendor.”
4 But I said, “I have labored in vain;
    I have spent my strength for nothing at all.
Yet what is due me is in the Lord’s hand,
    and my reward is with my God.”

5 And now the Lord says—
    he who formed me in the womb to be his servant
to bring Jacob back to him
    and gather Israel to himself,
for I am honored in the eyes of the Lord
    and my God has been my strength—
6 he says:
“It is too small a thing for you to be my servant
    to restore the tribes of Jacob
    and bring back those of Israel I have kept.
I will also make you a light for the Gentiles,
    that my salvation may reach to the ends of the earth.”

7 This is what the Lord says—
    the Redeemer and Holy One of Israel—
to him who was despised and abhorred by the nation,
    to the servant of rulers:
“Kings will see you and stand up,
    princes will see and bow down,
because of the Lord, who is faithful,
    the Holy One of Israel, who has chosen you.”

What does it mean to be chosen by God?  This week, more than most, we take the time to reflect on God's deep love for us, choosing us even over the life Jesus.  How do you live out your belovedness?  What does it mean for you to know that you have been chosen?  Like Isaiah has said so powerfully, people will come to know the power of God because of God's faithfulness, not because of who Isaiah is - and the same is true for each of us!

How does your life speak the presence of God?  How do you make God famous?  

Prayer:  Powerful and Loving God, today we thank you for choosing us.  Help us to live not out of our human-ness, but out of your chosen-ness.  May we also remember that there are so many who long to know what it means to find the source of Love, Light, and Goodness.  Help our voices to speak the prophetic Truth of faith.  Amen.  

Lent Devotional: As a hen gathers her chicks

37 “Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing. 38 Look, your house is left to you desolate. 39 For I tell you, you will not see me again until you say, ‘Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord.’”

This Scripture comes at the end of the 23rd chapter of Matthew (you can also find it in Luke).  It follows a long section of "Woe to you..." warnings that Jesus proclaimed to the Pharisees.  He was speaking to their lack of action, to their continuous restrictions that limited the very God that they were promoting.  This is one of those places where I think we can see the human side of Jesus, the man who just wanted them to practice what they preached, rather than focusing on the restriction of everyone else.  At the end of the seven woes, we find this Scripture that puts the heart of Christ on display.  He wants to gather the people in, to protect and comfort them, yet they will not allow him to do so.

Last August while I was in Kenya I finally realized exactly what this Scripture meant.  On the grounds of our center we have what they call "local chickens."  These are the chickens that run around the compound and often end up serving as dinner.  While we were there the number of chickens grew, and we were happy to see the chicks running around.  If you look closely at this picture you will see two chicks, being hidden and protected by the wings of their mother.  I had no idea the chicks where there until mama hen lifted up to reveal these tiny little ones.  The second picture shows you just how well mom was doing at protecting her children.  

Today marks the beginning of Holy Week, a week that brings us from joy to sorrow, from the palm-waving parade to the cries from the cross.  In the midst of all of it I imagine Jesus saying to us this day, "how often I have longed to gather you as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing."   

Wherever you find yourself this day, I pray that you know that you are loved as gently as this hen loves her chicks.  As we enter into this most sacred week of our faith lives, may we come as children, longing to be sheltered and protected, open to the mystery of the stories of the week.  

Prayer:  O God you have chosen to protect me as a mother hen protects her tiny ones.  Help me to be open to your sheltering presence this week.  Open to me a new and deeper understanding of sacrifice, love, loss, and joy in the midst of the unfolding redemption story. Amen.  

Lent Devotion: A Saturday Psalm

One of my life's greatest struggles has always been anxiety.  You might not think so when you meet me, but I have really struggled with the overpowering fear that comes along with feeling anxious.  It is never a good thing to be nervous or worried about things to a degree that it affects your ability to live in the present.  I am betting that some of you have faced a similar struggle at some point in your life.  

So for today's Saturday Psalm I have chosen Psalm 91.  This is a Psalm that is often referred to as the "Soldier's Prayer."  It speaks of the power of faith and trust that comes in knowing that God has our back, though that doesn't mean that things are always easy.  Have you ever been overly focused on the "what-if's?" This Psalm reminds us that we dwell in the shelter of the Most High, a safe and restful place.

Psalm 91

1 Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
    will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
    my God, in whom I trust.”

3 Surely he will save you
    from the fowler’s snare
    and from the deadly pestilence.
4 He will cover you with his feathers,
    and under his wings you will find refuge;
    his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.
5 You will not fear the terror of night,
    nor the arrow that flies by day,
6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
    nor the plague that destroys at midday.
7 A thousand may fall at your side,
    ten thousand at your right hand,
    but it will not come near you.
8 You will only observe with your eyes
    and see the punishment of the wicked.

9 If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,”
    and you make the Most High your dwelling,
10 no harm will overtake you,
    no disaster will come near your tent.
11 For he will command his angels concerning you
    to guard you in all your ways;
12 they will lift you up in their hands,
    so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
13 You will tread on the lion and the cobra;
    you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

14 “Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him;
    I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.
15 He will call on me, and I will answer him;
    I will be with him in trouble,
    I will deliver him and honor him.
16 With long life I will satisfy him
    and show him my salvation.”

It isn't as simple as saying that if we trust in God everything in our lives will go just as we desire, or that we will not face consequences of our choices.  The good news that I find here is that God is in control of the big picture.  While I get caught up all too often in the smallest details, fretting over the what-if's, God is continuing to sustain and Create - holding the big-picture of the world together.  

With what do you struggle?  How does this Psalm speak to you?  What does it mean for God to be your protection, you shelter, your salvation?

Prayer:  Lord, help me to rest in you.  Help me to find peace even in the things of the world that I do not fully understand.  Help me to trust in the power of your protection and shelter.  Today I pray that you would be present with all who suffer, with all who feel alone, with all who long to know what it is to be truly loved.  Help me too, to understand.  Amen.