It's been a while since I sat down and wrote something, but I have certainly been thinking about it for a few days. I'm in the middle of preaching a sermon series about Song of Songs and it's taken me a lot longer to prepare for than I expected it would. Turns out reading and discussing love and intimacy with an entire congregation can be pretty challenging! It's been fun though, too and I am always amazed at how God speaks through the text and the time we have in worship together. I am so grateful for the movement of the Holy Spirit!
In the midst of all this reading about love I have really been thinking about my own life and my hope to one day find someone to spend the rest of my life with. I find that I can easily get excited at the thought of dating and meeting someone, but at the same time it really scares me. As a pastor I wonder who would be interested in living this life with me? It would mean drastic changes in time-management and some changes in the care of my congregation. I can see the benefit in marrying as a young person and moving through life and all its changes with someone who has pledged to love you unconditionally. I think my brain has prevented me from settling in that way, as I have an earnest desire to be as available to do God's work as possible. For a long time now I have been certain that being single is the way it should be, in order for me to fully answer my call in the best way I know how. I realize at the same time however, that when (and if) I do meet that certain someone that our lives can actually mesh into something beyond my limited understanding at this point.
I was reading a quick devotion the other day and it focused on 1 Corinthians 13. The part that really caught my attention was that phrase "bears all things." I think this is often where I go wrong in my relationships with others, and even in relation to God probably. What does a love that bears all things really look like? In our culture where divorce is the easy way out of a challenging relationship and where individual needs/wants rule it is something to ponder. A love that "bears all things" doesn't get distracted by the little frustrations of our close friends/spouses/relatives. Maybe "bearing all things" means that we just chalk these things up to someone's uniqueness. Imagine what God can teach us about ourselves as we learn to love someone with a love that truly does "bear all things." That's what God's love is like for each of us, because Lord knows that we must do things that really make God question if this creation idea was such a good one.
If you haven't done it already, take a few minutes to read through Song of Songs. It is such a beautifully written poem that expresses one's love for another, yet it also exemplifies just how crazy being in a relationship can make us (notice the woman running through the night to find her lover....) We are people meant to be in connection with one another. We are most blessed by those friendships/relationships that strengthen/challenge/ and build us up to be people that can share this bear-all-things kind of love.
I'm going to work on this (with God's help, of course.)
If God needs you to have someone to help you do His work, He will put that person in the place needed. In the mean time, you can assist Him by taking chances and realizing that one date does not mean you need to marry that person. It is a great way to build up additional friendships. I can only pray that God has chosen to reward you with someone like I have in my wonderful wife. She is truly able to bear the things I put her through.
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